Love stories have the ability to tug at the strings of your heart. There is a certain hope we feel at the possibility of “happily ever after”. However, life experiences have a sneaky way of giving you a doze of reality check; a cure for the momentary bout of cinderella syndrome you were apparently suffering from. I have heard love stories that literally squeezed my heart into a mushy state of ‘awwwwwwwwwwww’, causing a plethora of emotions that even my mind struggled to understand. Yes, it was just that magical. These are love stories that have the essentials, boy meets girl, boy chases (sometimes literally) girl, girl fronts (maybe) for a period of time, boy remains persistent, girl gives in, circumstances try to tear them apart, but they tarry and they go on to live their happily ever after. I have come to learn however that love stories are meant to be personal, not a re-enactment of fiction or someone else’s story. Your love story is customized to you, designed (depending on the creativity level of the couple lol) to wow your senses. After all, conventional is quite boring.
My love story is perfect. It is a 100% pure, no inconsistencies or imperfections. He knew me way before I even heard about him. Basically, he loved me from afar. He orchestrated a grande show of His love for me, I was aware of it, but didn’t connect to it. All I remember thinking was oh, how sweet. He was persistent, and very strategic, sending people my way to get my attention. But I was too busy being distracted by the shadows of boys pretending to be men. He wrote me love letters bonded like a book (cheesy right?), professing his undying love for me. I read them, but the words never jumped out at me. Thus, I left the book in my pile of “to do”, gathering dust. It took a series of events, to get me to stop. In being still, I was able to reflect. In reflecting, I opened old wounds and a flood gate of emotions I wasn’t equipped to deal with. The scars they left behind deceived me into believing I was completely healed. In that state, when I felt most ugly and unwanted, he came right back into my life, with open arms and I willingly ran into them. The year 2009 marked the beginning of my perfect love story.
It took me quite a while to accept the reality of his love. It seemed unreal, the fear in me could not comprehend how anyone could so willingly love one so imperfect. I remember once, he said to me, nothing you confess or do could make me love you any less, allow me love you, let my love for you nourish and sustain you. He always knew just what to say to make my heart smile, one of the many perks of having him as my love. It is his love that nursed me back to whole. His love is energy for me. His love is food to my soul. His love pumps life into my days. What did I do to deserve this kind of love? The answer….nothing, absolutely nothing. He knocked at the door of my heart for so long, with a desire to fill me up with goodness. Out of curiosity, I peeked through the window, but foolish me didn’t let him in. The wonder of his love, he embodies patience.
My gosh, why did I deprive myself of this for so long?
Butterflies; I don’t get those when I am with him. What I get is peace, that feeling of home. He gave all he had for me, such an unselfish kind of love. Gone are the days of waterfalls, that craving for momentary excitement. He is my running water, oh so soothing. He is my excitement, dynamic yet consistent in all his ways.
I never thought I would trust again, just like I never thought I would love again. But he got me soo good, walking with me, and getting me to a place of contentment and balance. He infuses in me a daily doze of sweetness, as he gingerly peels off the layers and knocks down the walls. I don’t even know how he was able to get past the bolted door, but he did. I shed the weight – the baggage, the drama. I am naked before him, and it bothers me not. The once forgotten love letters have become my road map, and my source of hope.
There is no fear in our love, there are no insecurities in our love. He showcases me with gladness, he takes pride in me, and I am quick to declare my love for him.
The Bible is my daily reminder. He sacrificed His one and only, Jesus Christ for me.
He reduces me to love.
I am his lady, and He is my Lord.
A letter from me to my Father in heaven.