Rihanna’s ‘adopted’ children

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There has been a lot of talk lately about the need for Rihanna to act more like a role model. Apparently, unbeknownst to her, she adopted the entire young female population on her rise to stardom. She has been criticized quit a bit for getting back with Chris Brown, not necessarily because they are worried about her safety, but more so because they are concerned about the message she is sending their teenage daughters. In all honesty, in her own words, “it is nobody’s business”, especially if the uproar is founded on ulterior motives. Unfortunately, people are quick to crucify. Pointing fingers at another, when really they are far from being devoid of mistakes and issues themselves. I liken trying to imagine what people do behind closed doors, hidden from prying eyes, waging fingers and inquisitive toms (media) to insanity, because I don’t think anyone’s mind can carry the weight of the tons of filth they may come to know, and remain sane.

Life is about choices, and Riri’s choices are just that, hers. I think it’s unfair for the media to pressure her into role modelling for anyone, and I think it is utterly stupid for mothers to expect badgirlriri to raise their daughters. If your daughters decide to follow her lead by acting out in ‘forbidden’ ways, then there obviously isn’t enough parenting in the household.

I don’t even understand why so much trust is placed in pop stars to be role models. Sure it’s good to dream and dream big and sure, it’s good to aspire to be someone great. But shouldn’t aspiration go beyond the glitz and glam? The RAD clothes and fancy rides, the partying and smoking up. Where’s the character in that? Your daughters are being told every day that sex sells, and they are buying it. They develop their views on love from fictional characters on tv series, that look perfect and unrealistic. Soon, they aspire to become replicas of their so called ‘role models’, denying self from taking shape.

Exactly what gives you the right to sit on your high horse, criticizing and judging? Rihanna has said she is unapologetic. She is living her life, and rightfully so. How about YOU be an active role model in your daughter’s life. How about YOU focus less on Rihanna’s bad ways and focus more on the young girl(s) in your household looking to YOU for direction. How about YOU loose your microwave mentality and instead of trying to fix your child in a day and in her teenage years, invest your time in her life from birth. How about YOU stop asking Rihanna, Britney Spears, and Amanda Bynes to raise your daughter(s). You don’t know the context or the story behind the story, but you sure seize the opportunity to point accusatory fingers. Is it therapeutical for you, because you get a few seconds to look away from your own life to the dirty laundry of another? These people do not owe you their lives.

I wish more people would spend more time with their noses deep in their Bibles instead of wrinkled in disgust and in a judgemental stance at someone else’s life and actions.

Proverbs 22:6 says “Teach your child to choose the right path and when they are older they will remain upon it.” This does NOT happen in a day. It takes time, effort, dedication, perseverance and patience. Yes! Raising a child means short circuiting your selfish tendencies and living outside of yourself to build up your child!

Ephesians 6:4 says “And now a word for you Fathers. Don’t make your children angry by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction approved by the Lord” God is love and even when He instructs and disciplines, it is in LOVE. If you cannot comprehend or show love; contempt, frustrations and anger take the reigns and that does not make for a happy home.

Deuteronomy 4:9 says “But watch out! Be very careful never to forget what you have seen the Lord do for you. Do not let these things escape from your mind as long as you live. And be sure to pass them unto your children and grandchildren. Tell them especially about the day when you stood before your Lord your God at Mount Sinai where He told me, “summon the people before me, and I will instruct them” that way, they will learn to fear me as long as they live, and they will be able to teach my laws to their children.” What are you teaching your children, especially your daughters, who from an early age desire acceptance and affection? It goes beyond obeying laws. Teaching her about the love of a Father so kind and faithful is more important than shoving laws down her throat. Love has more staying power, and in being conscious of a Father who loves her, she is more inclined to seek His face in matters concerning her life, and less inclined to fulfil the lust of a lad that is on the fence of puberty or an old jigalo who preys and capitalizes on her innocence.

Deuteronomy 11:19 says “But do not let your heart turn away from the Lord to worship other gods. If you do, the Lords anger will burn against you. He will shut up the sky and hold back the rain, and your harvest will fail. Then you will quickly die in the good land the Lord is now giving you. So commit yourself completely to these words of mine. Tie them to your hands as a reminder and wear them on your forehead. Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are away on a journey, when you are lying down and when you are getting up again.” TIME TIME TIME! It is important to spend time with your children. That is the only way you can have an impact in their lives. Conversations are not one sided…as oppose to giving them a laundry list of commands accompanied with silence or rebuke, TALK to your children and LISTEN to them as well.

Don’t get me wrong, there are certain behaviours that I do not condone, but I’m not foolish to think that I am better than anyone else, for it truly is by His grace that I did not go down a certain path. God did not appoint you to be judge over anyone’s life, so come off your high horse and give your attention to building your own home. Do not create a liability out of an asset by giving her – your daughter -little or no attention, then turn around blaming the world when *ish hits the fan, as you run from pillar to post looking for remedies.

I do not have a daughter yet, but I am excited about meeting her soon. I unclasped the hold anxiety had over me where raising children were concerned once I realized that everything is by His grace. Not by my abilities but by His spirit.

So next time you see a news flash about a celeb gone wild, make a conscious effort to stop yourself from judging and playing the blame game, and instead spend a fraction of the time lifting him/her up in prayers. That’s a more useful way to spend your time.

Have a lovely day
xoxo 😘

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4 responses »

  1. Thank you for the inspiring mindset you exude. Its a sorry situation where no one wants to take responsibility for their own life, family, future etc, looking for celebs or governments to assign that to.
    Proverbs 22:6 in the KJV clarifies that there is actually ‘A Way’ the child is ought to grow, so its our responsibility as parent to give them that ‘Way’ and of cause, its the God-way.

    Another inspiring and heart-cleansing read,
    Thank you!

    • Absolutely. It seems folks would rather place the responsibility of building their lives and homes in the hands of some else. On a side note, I find KJV hard to read…sigh…need to work on that!

      Thank you for your kind words!

  2. Great article! Really enjoyed reading this post. It’s very true though, we are so quick to highlight the shortcomings of others like celebrities and public figures who we feel should be held to a higher standard while ignoring our own blatant deficiencies.

    I also find it interesting that the Proverbs 22:6 says to train up a child in the right way and WHEN THEY ARE OLDER, they will not depart from it, which totally highlights your earlier point that the training doesn’t take part in a day, a week, a month etc but requires a great deal of time and that the results of that training may not be evident until the child gets comes “of age” and faces challenges in the real world on their own. And even if that child has hiccups along the way or strays so far from the truth, the solid foundation that has been laid will always be there and that child will find someday their way back.

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